Life Is Uncertain Eat Dessert First
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Funny Sarcastic Slogan Shirts — Page 5 of 11
45 designs from the Artful Paws collection, printed on demand by TeePublic on tees, hoodies, mugs and stickers. Every order ships worldwide with a 30-day return window.
The largest collection in the store, and the hardest to summarise: sarcastic one-liners, dry observations, and the everyday complaints that do not fit any other category.
The through-line is that these are for ordinary days rather than occasions. Work, the shops, the commute, a bad mood, a Sunday spent doing nothing. Most of the catalogue gets worn far more than an event shirt ever would.
The lettering is deliberately plain. The line does the work and the design stays out of its way, which is why these read from across a room. Browse the pages below, or use the collections above if you have a specific person in mind.
Life Is Uncertain Eat Dessert First
Queen Of The Leaf Blower
Life Begins After Coffee
Sometimes when I close my eyes I can't see
What Was I Doing Again
Everything Hurts And You Want Me To Smile
A Well Read Woman Is A Dangerous Creature
I don't even believe myself when I say I'll be ready in 5 minutes
Be Cool Don't Be All Like Uncool
I'm Hilarious Once You Overlook The Fact That I'm An Asshole
This is my disco costume
All this forehead and i still can't remember
Im Not Short Im Penguin Size
Hello My Name Is Chicken Nugget
People Say I Act Like I Don't Care It's Not An Act
The answer to any problem is excel spreadsheet
Great Minds Begin At Head Start
Have the day you deserve
Good Things Come to Those Who Sweat
Please don't interrupt me while I am ignoring you
Dont Talk To Me I'M Not Friendly
Veterinary Medicine
Catch flights not feelings
Good morning I see the assassins have failed
Some Girls Love Titos and Cuss Too Much It's Me I'm Some Girls
Probably hungry Likely sleepy Always cold
I Got 99 Problems Show Your Work on all of them
I'm Already Tired Tomorrow
Repeat After Me Yes Coach
On Wednesdays We Smash the Patriarchy
Math the Only Subject That Counts
Be A Goldfish
Lab Rat Reporting For Duty
The River Is Calling And I Must Row
Being adult is the dumbest thing i've done
I Love Being Delusional
It's Never Mannequin
I'd Agree With You But Then We'd Both Be Wrong
Before You Speak Remember I Have Admin Rights
My Car Runs On Batteries
Life Is Better With Pancakes
See You in the Douches
Pierogi Squad
Gastro Squad gastroenterology
Warning May Start Talking About History