Go-to shirt for a 6am walk in the rain

Fabric, fit and sizing

The i have selective hearing design goes onto an everyday-weight blank rather than a fashion cut. The base garment is a comfortable cotton blend, light enough for summer and thick enough not to go see-through. Sizing is standard unisex. Order your usual size for a regular fit, or one up for a relaxed drape. The artwork is drawn clean and bold, so the breed stays readable from across a dog park.

How it is made and shipped

The i have selective hearing shirt does not exist until someone orders it. Each piece is printed only after you order it, which keeps the colours sharp and cuts the waste. TeePublic handles fulfilment and ships worldwide, with a 30-day return window if the fit is wrong. Wash it inside out on cold and skip the tumble dryer if you want the print crisp for years.

Where it works

It pairs with jeans and muddy trainers, which is realistic for anyone who walks a dog daily. Most of its life will not be spent at parties. It is built for being useless in bed, for banging your girlfriend, and for the school run on a day when getting dressed is not the priority. You are not stuck with one format for I have selective hearing you weren't selected funny cat lover. The same design is available on hoodies, crewnecks, tank tops, mugs, stickers and phone cases, so it works as a small gift or a large one.

Common questions